


Gaza Santa

by purplefox



Category: DCU (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Christmas, Crack, Gen, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-09-09 19:45:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8909620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purplefox/pseuds/purplefox
Summary: Of all the Batkids Jason never thought it would be Tim to have the questionable taste in music. He never expected it to catch either.





	

Jason was not feeling any sort of Christmas spirit considering the results of his patrol. Thanksgiving had already been a mess in itself considering he had been ambushed and dragged to spend time with the others in the mansion. If he had known bitching about not being invited one time would cause that he would have kept his big mouth shut.

Still as it was his patrol had him in a bad mood, he had kept his ears to the ground in order to track down the people moving some drugs that he had heard were connected to Penguin but he had instead stumbled across something that looked a little bigger than that.

Not to mention where some those drugs were going. He was not feeling in the giving spirit unless the giving included some bullets and some smashed kneecaps. He really needed info as well and if he was to start raising hell and doling out bullets so deep in the Bat’s territory then the Bat would be the one really not feeling the Christmas spirit.

Lucky for him he had a few options to turn to for help. Not Dickie bird because Jason still wanted to punch him in the face for the crap he had pulled for Thanksgiving, and the crap tattling he did when Jason was laying low after he got injured.

Waking up after being out on painkillers to find a hovering Bat was not something he wanted to experience again anytime soon. It had creeped him out even though he had known Bruce was worried but he could have at least ditched the costume. He was lucky Jason had not put a bullet in him for good measure.

But of all the Bats Tim was the one that he could stand the most. He and Damian rubbed each other the wrong way too many times to be cool or even casual beyond small stints at a time. He wanted to punch Dick in the face a bit too much but Tim was good, useful too and someone Jason could relate to… also hang out and try to corrupt him a bit.

And lucky for him he knew exactly where Tim was. In more ways than one, he knew the younger boy was not on patrol and considering how well he knew Tim’s habits he had a smile on his face before he activated his coms and switched frequency. “Are you spying on me princess or have you gotten your fill for the day?”

There was a soft crackle in his ear before heard music in the background and a loud sigh. “Very funny Red Hood.”

The beat of the music distracted him for just a bit before Jason laughed. “Well your feet are up because you sprained your feet little bird. No patrol for you and I know you can’t shut that brain of yours off and like hell the big B is letting you work on cases so you are going to be in your little base being a creepy little thing spying on the rest of us.”

“Shut up.” Tim laughed. “And I was given a case to work on by the Big B himself.”

“And was this given to you or did you-“ Jason paused. “Is that trap music? What the hell are you listening to? It sounds like Christmas music but jesus.”

“Shut up.” Tim hissed. Jason snorted before he put his helmet back on and sat on his bike. “Don’t act like your music choices are that much better.”

“Yes they are.” Jason pointed out before he started his bike. “Jesus I have no idea what they are saying but what I am picking up sounds like-“ He laughed when he pulled out the alley. “Not your sort of thing princess.”

“Be quiet, I like this.” Tim stressed. “Superboy crashed us in Trinidad a few years back and…” He laughed. “You can say I enjoyed myself a bit.”

“How did Alfred not kill you?” Jason wondered aloud. “Did you play that in the mansion? He nearly blew the roof that one time Nightwing played hard rock.”

“He played English metal and PennyOne was in denial.” Tim chuckled when Jason went through a set of lights. “Are you in that much of a hurry?”

“You’re watching my every move?” Jason sighed. “And do you have that on repeat? So you can figure out what the fuck they are saying? Because what words I do pick up make no sense Princess.” He ignored Tim’s muttering in response in order to cackle.

X

“I’m appalled.” Jason stated the moment Tim let him into the base. “I actually thought if anyone was to have such music tastes it would be Dick. For it to be you? It would be like Cass suddenly playing Pop or R&B.”

“Go fuck yourself Jason.” Tim hissed from his seat at his computer. His feet were elevated on a cushion and Jason grinned before he came up behind the younger boy and placed his hands on top the huge chair.

“Come on Timbo, it is all love. We can’t all be perfect but what the hell is this. I’m a street kid and I’ve never heard stuff like this and I know some Rap.”

“Dub is different to Rap Just like how Reggae is different to everything else.”

“This isn’t Reggae, give me some credit Timbo.” Jason snorted before the screen changed to a music video. “So that’s the video to this?”

“Yeah.” Tim smiled. Jason leaned around the chair to watch Tim.

“You’re a dork you know? I can’t believe of all the songs to like, all the Christmas and Christmas parody songs you get attached to this one. The one that is the most violent.”

“You want my help or not?” Tim asked sweetly.

“I get it, I’ll leave it alone.” Jason laughed. “For now.”

X

“First day of Christmas somebody play three,” Jason hummed. “Walk pon the Gully pappy bring the KG, Me carry one pon a shot, K me a clap that and fling the grinch in the Christmas tree.” He finished while he looked down at the gang around him.

If he was to leave the warehouse as it was and call the police with a tip then there was still the chance some could escape. All he had to do was round them up, toss the weapons… take them outside and blow the warehouse.

“Gaza man done kill Santa Claus, pa ra pa pam pam ra pa pam pam.” He sang while he tucked away his guns. “What do you know, the song does grow on you.” His communicator beeped twice and he rolled his eyes before he answered. “Yes everyone lived and I’m feeling the Christmas spirit Timbo.”

“Good because you’re my ride.” Tim said before he cut the communications. A laugh escaped Jason before he returned to his duty.


End file.
